Whodunnit
by Smarty 94
Summary: A day before a concert at Gravity Falls; somebody destroy's Ray's disk jockey table and Sonic tries to find out who. Meanwhile; Duncan convinces Sideswipe to enter a racing competition in order to make tons of money.
1. Gravity Fall's Gig

The Toon Manor RV sputtered a bit on the road and stopped next to the Gravity Falls water tower.

Ray came out of the RV and popped the hood before inspecting the oil stick.

"Oil pressure perfectly normal." said Ray.

He looked at the battery.

"Battery's doing very good." said Ray.

He looked at some more stuff.

"Alright, the engine's very bad. But I can fix that bad boy up in two hours." said Ray.

He then sighed.

"Better tell everyone." said Ray.

He walked back into the RV and told the entire Sonic Underground everything.

Sonic went werehog and walked out of the RV.

"Ben, help out." said Sonic.

He went to the front as Ben walked out of the RV and turned on his Omnitrix.

"Come on Diamondhead." said Ben.

He slammed down on the omnitrix and turned into The Worst.

Sonic is mad.

"Seriously?" said Sonic.

"What, I can't control what this thing gives me." said The Worst.

Sonic streached out a hand and punched the omnitrix, turning The Worst into Rath.

Rath said something in Spanish and punched Sonic sending him in a lake.

Sonic got out of the lake.

"Let me tell you something Sonic the Hedgehog, nobody punches the Omnitrix but Rath." said Sonic, "That's original."

Later; the two managed to get the RV to the Mystery Shack, and everyone in the band save for Randy got out.

Howard turned to Randy.

"You ain't coming out?" said Howard.

"The last time I showed up here, I was lassoed up onto a tree." said Randy.

Sonic scoffed and went back to normal.

"Dude, I'm pretty sure that only happened once. It can't happen again." said Sonic.

Randy stepped out of the RV and instantly stepped on a lasso trap and was sent dangling on a tree.

The teenage ninja groaned.

"SERIOUSLY!?" yelled Randy.

Everyone looked up.

"Look at it this way; at least it can't get any worse." said Kai.

However; Wendy showed up and cut the rope, causing Randy to fall on the ground.

Everyone turned to Kai.

The omnitrix started beeping before turning Rath back to Ben.

"Nice, very nice." said Ben.

Randy groaned and got up.

"Why do you keep doing this to me Wendy? Everyone now knows that I'm the Norrisville Ninja." said Randy.

Wendy laughed.

"I keep forgetting about that." said Wendy.

Ray turned to Howard and saw him on the road.

"You might want to get off the road." said Ray.

Howard became confused.

"Why?" said Howard.

Suddenly; a tour bus drove over Howard, crushing him.

The door opened up and steps fell on Howard, crushing him some more.

A kid named Dipper Pines, his twin sister Mabel Pines, their uncles Stan and Ford Pines, and a pig named Waddles came off the bus, crushing Howard some more.

The bus then drove off, crushing Howard once more.

"That's why." said Ray.

"Got it." said Howard.

Sonic turned to Stan.

"Well your a sight for sore eyes." said Sonic.

"I'd say the same for you." said Stan.

Sonic then looked at Ford and became confused.

"I'm his brother." said Ford.

"Reasonable." said Sonic.

Stan then thought of something.

"Wait, why're you here?" said Stan.

"We're performing here in Gravity Falls." said Ben.

Dipper became confused.

"Where at?" said Dipper.

"The stage next to this shack." said Trent.

Everyone turned and saw a stage that was being built by Soos.

"Never thought building one of these would be tiring." said Soos.

Ray noticed the toolbox next to Soos and approached him.

"Can I borrow those tools for a couple of hours? I need to repair the RV's engines." said Ray.

Soos shook his head.

"Sorry Limbless Dude but I should do it." said Soos.

"Alright." said Ray.

He walked off.

Wendy approached him and started inspecting the limbless hero.

"No arms, legs, or neck." Wendy said as she opened his mouth and looked inside, "Yet still seems to have internal organs."

She then closed Ray's mouth.

"The good thing about not having any limbs is that I can't get a yeast infection." said Ray.

Wendy laughed.

"Obviously." said Wendy.

"So how much have you heard of me?" said Ray.

Wendy pulled out her smart phone and pulled up Ray's Facebook page.

"So much." said Wendy.

Ray looked at his own Facebook page.

"Created by five fairies centuries ago, slept for a hundred years, in a relationship, likes World of Warcraft, Final Fantasy Explorers, and Weird Al Yankovic music." said Ray, "Yeah that's all true."

Ford is confused.

"What's all of that?" said Ford.

"Some game people play on their computers with Internet connection, a Nintendo 3DS game much like World of Warcraft but different, and a musician who makes parodies of other peoples songs." said Dipper.

Ray pulled out his accordion.

"Check this out." said Ray.

He started playing the accordion.

"Huh, nothing I've ever heard." said Ford.

"You should hear him on his other instrument called a Disk Jockey table." said Sonic.

Ford smiled.

"As long as he plays very good, I'll be happy." said Ford.

Later; Ray was playing the Fifth Symphony on his DJ table with lots of wacky sounds, much to Stan and Ford's disturbance.

"I'm not happy, are you happy bro?" said Stan.

"Not happy." said Ford.

Ray looked at the two elders.

"Come on it's not that bad." said Ray.

"Yes it is." said Mayor Tyler from far away.

"Old people, they wouldn't know good tunes if it bit them on the butt." said Howard, "Now if I were president, I would make sure everyone listened to rock and rap music only."

"Check out these recording's I got from my disk jockey recorders." said Ray.

He pushed the play button on a recorder.

" _Hi, I'm Howard Weinerman, and I..._ "The recorder said before changing it's voice, " _Pooped my own pants._ "

Everyone but Howard started laughing.

Howard became mad.

"Hey, I've never done that." said Howard.

Ray rewound the recorder and played it again.

" _Hi, I'm Howard Weinerman, and I..._ " The recorder said before Ray pushed the play button on another recorder before it finished in Howard's voice, " _Pooped my own pants._ "

Howard groaned.

"Okay fine, I did that once, but it was in the 5th grade." said Howard.

Ray pushed the play button on a recorder.

" _No, it was in the eighth grade. Also, I've been a bed wetter till I was 14 years old._ " Howard's voice said from the recorder.

Everyone laughs.

Howard groaned.

"I'm a remarkable person." said Howard.

"Yeah right." said Trent.

Penny started to look through a TV Guide.

"Hey, The Ellen DeGeneres Show is starting in fifteen minutes." said Penny.

"Now that's a remarkable person. Loved her in Finding Nemo and Finding Dory." said Sonic.

"Agreed." said Mabel.

Everyone nodded.

Wendy tried to touch the disk jockey table, but her hand was smacked by Ray.

"Sorry, only I can touch Kevin." said Ray.

Wendy became shocked.

"You named your table?" said Wendy.

"Yep." said Ray.

"Steve Harvey was unavailable?" said Ben.

Kai giggled.

Ray pulled out an Auto tuned microphone and set it to Steve Harvey.

"And be sued by the real deal?" said Ray.

"It was only a suggestion. I could have suggested myself." said Ben.

Ray set the microphone to Ben Tennyson.

"My name is Benjamin Kirby Tennyson, and I stole a watch with tons of alien DNA meant for my grandfather." said Ray.

Kai looked at Ben

"Is that true?' she asked.

"By accident." said Ben.

Ray turned off the auto tune microphone.

"And you sure took advantage of the bad case of mistaken identity." Ray said before walking into the mystery shack.

Ben groaned.

"I was identified as his grandson." said Ben.

Later; nighttime has fallen and an explosion sound was heard before a flashlight light was seen and a scream.

"KEVIN!" yelled the voice.

It turned out that Ray was looking at his disk jockey table which was destroyed.

"Somebody murdered Kevin." Ray said, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-"

Ray continued on to the morning as Sonic was watching in a brown bathrobe while drinking a cup of coffee.

He pulled out a stop watch and looked at how long Ray was crying.

"8.4 hours? That's a new record." said Sonic.


	2. The Toon City 3000

At the mansion; Duncan was in the game room playing Conker's Bad Fur Day on the Xbox One.

The Juvie laughed.

"That potty mouthed squirrel sure is funny." said Duncan.

Sideswipe looked into the room from outside since he was to big to enter the mansion.

"Hey Duncan." said the red autobot.

Duncan turned to Sideswipe.

"Hey." said Duncan.

"What're you doing?" said Sideswipe.

Duncan turned to the TV.

"Playing an M rated video game." said Duncan.

Sideswipes is shocked.

"Seriously?" said Sideswipe.

"Yeah." said Duncan.

Sideswipe is mad.

"Super Mario was unavailable?" said Sideswipe.

"That's Nintendo, this is Microsoft." said Duncan.

He pulled out a TV Guide and read it.

"Hey, a marathon of The Ellen DeGeneres Show is on." said Duncan.

Sideswipes is mad.

"That lesbian has her own show?" The Autobot asked.

"Of course she does." said Duncan, "And I don't think you can say something like that in a fan fiction without getting into any trouble."

Sideswipe zipped his lips.

Duncan then turned on the cable.

"DO YOU LIKE EXTREME CAR RACING LIKE IN THOSE FAST AND FURIOUS FILMS?!" a voice yelled from the TV.

Duncan became interested.

"I'm listening." said Duncan.

"DO YOU LIKE SEEING A HUGE ASS CAR PILEUP EXPLODING INTO A BALL OF FIRE!?" the same booming voice said.

"Yeah man." said Duncan.

"THEN SIGN UP FOR THE TOON CITY 3000!" yelled the voice.

Duncan is shocked.

"THIS HAS EVERYTHING! EXPLOSIONS, MONSTER TRUCKS, EXPLOSIONS, GOOD FOOD, EXPLOSIONS, A NURSERY FOR THE KIDS, EXPLOSIONS, AND MOST OF ALL EXPLOSIONS!' The Voice yelled.

"YEAH MAN!" yelled Duncan.

Sideswipe became confused.

"Why was the commercial constantly saying explosions after every other statement?" said Sideswipe.

"CALL THE NUMBER ON THE SCREEN NOW TO GET INTO THE RACE OR FOR SOME TICKETS! DON'T MISS ANY OF THE EXPLOSIONS!" the TV yelled before exploding.

Sideswipe was shocked.

"Did that just explode? Oh man Bugs will be mad." said Sideswipe.

Duncan however was using his cell phone.

"Yeah, I'd like to sign myself up for entering your race." said Duncan.

Mumbling was heard from the phone.

"What's my car? An exotic red sports car that just so happens to be a Cybertronian." said Duncan.

Sideswipe turned to Duncan.

"Don't make me your car. I'm a family man now." said Sideswipe.

Duncan turned to the Autobot.

"And how's that going for you?" said Duncan.

"Great." said Sideswipe.

Duncan went back to the phone.

"Is that all?" said Duncan.

Mumbling was heard on the phone.

"Okay then." Duncan said before turning off the phone.

He turned to the Autobot.

"I told you I wanted no part of this." said Sideswipe.

"You also scanned a vehicle mode with a cool design and high speed when you showed up here." said Duncan.

"A choice I'm starting to regret." said Sideswipe.

Duncan was listen to a pair of headphones.

"What's that? I can't hear you over this audio tape of the Toon City 3000 contenders saying that they'll wipe the tracks with your face on it!" yelled Duncan.

The Autobot is mad.

"Jerk." said Sideswipes. "I wonder if the Mario Brothers had this trouble?"

 **Cutaway Gag**

In the Mushroom Kingdom; Princess Peach was next to three green warp pipes.

"The evil Bowser has taken over the Mushroom Kingdom." said Peach.

Mario came out one pipe.

"I shall save the kingdom." said Mario.

Luigi came out another pipe.

"Me to." said Luigi.

Then a black guy in an orange shirt, hat, and blue overalls came out the last pipe.

"And me." The black man said sounding like Kevin Hart.

Peach became confused.

"Who the hell are you?" said Peach.

The third man turned to Peach.

"The names Jamarcus. The third Mario bro." The man known as Jamarcus said.

The Princess was shocked.

"That's strange. I didn't even though there was a 3rd Mario Brother." said Peach.

"He's adopted and had a falling out with papa." said Mario.

"It's true." said Luigi.

"That's right, I've been living in Detroit. Even though the crime rate is very high in that city." said Jamarcus.

A Lakitu appeared, scaring Jamarcus.

The black Mario brother screamed.

"Don't worry bro, I've got this." said Mario.

He pulled out a fire flower and became Fire Mario before shooting a fireball on the Lakitu, killing it.

"What the hell was that thing?" said Jamarcus.

"That was a Lakitu." said Luigi, "They attack by dropping spiky like turtles on us."

Jamarcus groaned.

"That's it, I can't take it anymore. There are to many turtle like monsters in this place. I'm going back to Detroit." said Jamarcus.

"But if you stay here and help save the kingdom, you can keep the gold coins you collect." said Peach.

Jamarcus became shocked and smirked as the Super Mario Bros 1-Up tune played.

"I'll collect a thousand gold coins." said Jamarcus.

He jumped out of the pipe and ran off.

"Maybe we should have told him that Bowser can breath fire." said Mario.

"He'll figure it out." said Luigi.

Later; Jamarcus made it to the last part of World 8-4 and was facing Bowser.

"It ends here. I'll get my coins and leave this kingdom once I'm done with you." said Jamarcus.

Bowser breathed a bunch of fire on Jamarcus before it cleared off, revealing that the black Mario Bro was charred up.

He then pulled out a white flag.

"Uncle, uncle." said Jamarcus.

Bowser smirked.

"That was to easy." said Bowser.

 **End Cutaway Gag**

"Hey, where are the wife and kids anyways?" said Duncan.

"First off, we're not married, secondly, Windblade's taking them to see the rings of Saturn." said Sideswipe.

Duncan nodded.

"Good to know." said Duncan.

He walked to the window and climbed out of it.

"Wait, you're serious about entering this race?" said Sideswipe.

"Yep, let's go." said Duncan.

"But what about that Ellen DeGeneres Show?" said Sideswipe.

"She was better off in Finding Nemo and Finding Dory." said Duncan.

Sideswipe transformed into his vehicle form and Duncan got into it before leaving.

Bugs entered the game room and saw the destroyed TV before becoming shocked.

He walked out of the room and walked back in.

"Eh, I've got thousands of TV's in the basement." said Bugs.


	3. Sonic Hercule

Back at Gravity Falls; Ray continued to yell 'No' non stop until the Sonic Underground came out of the RV in either bathrobes or pajamas.

Everyone else came to the area as well.

"Okay, I can't take it anymore Ray." said Sonic, "Now what is it?"

Ray continued to scream no.

Sonic groaned.

He grabbed Ray's tongue and poured some hot sauce on it before putting it back in Ray's mouth.

Ray started gagging a bit before wheezing.

He stopped and looked at the others.

"I was almost done." said Ray.

"Don't care." said Sonic.

Ben noticed the destroyed disk jockey table.

"Hey, somebody murdered Kevin." said Ben.

Howard turned to the readers in shock as suspenseful music played.

Penny became confused.

"Wait, where's that song coming from?" said Penny.

"Who cares." asked Sonic.

"Such a dark thing to do." said Soos.

"Who would do such a thing?" said Howard.

Randy turned to Howard and became shocked to see him in feet y pajama's with ducks on it.

"Howard, are those feet y pajama's?" said Randy.

Howard is mad.

"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to." said Howard.

Sonic did some thinking.

"Rayman, I shall bring Kevin's killer to justice." said Sonic.

Ray turned to Sonic.

"You'll really do that?" said Ray.

"Well, if I was in the appropriate attire." said Sonic.

Penny grabbed Sonic and went into the RV before closing the door.

The door opened up and Sonic came out in a brown coat, brown hat, and a monocle on his right eye.

Everyone looked at Sonic.

"It's missing something. But what?" said Kai.

Wendy did some thinking before pulling out a curved smoking pipe and putting it in Sonic's mouth.

"Better." said Kai

Sonic however spits it out.

"I don't believe in doing any smoking of any kind in front of two thirteen year olds, or underage smoking." said Sonic.

Wendy grabbed the pipe and puts it in her own mouth.

"Relax, this thing only blows bubbles." said Wendy.

She then blew into the pipe, blowing out some bubbles.

"Well in that case put it back in my mouth then." said Sonic.

Wendy smiled and put the pipe back in Sonic's mouth.

"I say, good show old girl." Sonic said in a Belgian accent.

Wendy chuckled before playfully punching Sonic on the shoulder.

Everyone but Sonic and Penny walked off.

Sonic knelled down to the table and inspected it.

He put a finger on one of the disk parts of the table before putting it in his mouth.

"Coca Cola." said Sonic, "Somebody's been drinking soda close to this thing."

"But some soda couldn't have destroyed this thing, it would only cause it to short out." said Penny.

"Just be glad this wasn't that Chernobyl stuff, otherwise god knows what could have happened." said Sonic.

 **Cutaway Gag**

A shadowy figure poured Chernobyl onto a disk jockey before they disappeared and reappeared in Salem during the witch trial years.

A bunch of people appeared and became shocked.

"Witch, this is witchcraft." said one of the guys.

Everyone pulled out shotguns and started shooting the figure and the disk jockey table before the figure fell on the ground dead.

 **End Cutaway Gag**

"This isn't a John Cusack film." said Penny.

Sonic laughed.

"Of course not." said Sonic.

He then saw parts of a red TNT stick and grabbed it before putting it in his jacket.

"That might tell us something." said Sonic.

He stood up.

"I believe there is only one thing left to do. We must dust the body." said Sonic.

"For fingerprints?" said Penny.

"No-ho-o. It's filthy." said Sonic.

He pulled out a feather duster and started dusting the table.

He looked at something and stopped dusting and grabbed a piece of cloth before smiling.

"I know who the killer is." said Sonic.

He turned to Penny.

"Gather everyone into the Mystery Shack." said Sonic.


	4. Prepare For the Race

With Duncan and Sideswipe; they were entering a racing track with Long Arm in his chain and hook tow truck form.

"Question, why are we taking the tow truck with us?" said Sideswipe.

Long Arm drove up next to Sideswipe.

"Because you need a pit crew. Also, I was one of the best mechanics of my old search and rescue team back on Cybertron." said Long Arm.

"Yeah right." said Sideswipe.

"It's true, I was part of a search and rescue team. But I left because everyone was more concerned about how they look instead of saving others." said Long Arm.

"I'm pretty sure they were very outdated." said Duncan.

 **Cutaway Gag**

In the G1 Universe; Soundwave, Shockwave, Thundercracker, Dirge, Skywarp, Ramjet, Thrust, Blitzwing, Astrotrain, Reflector, and Rumble were in a pawn shop trying to free Megatron who was stuck in gun mode and with a trigger lock.

"Yeah, I'd like to buy that gun." said Thundercracker.

The pawn shop owner looked at Megatron.

"That'll be a hundred dollars." said the pawn shop owner.

Megatron groaned.

"I'm worth way more then a hundred dollars." Megatron thought.

"We don't have earth currency." said Shockwave.

"Now what?" said Skywarp.

Shockwave pulled out a smart phone.

"Says here on this fleshling website that Soundwave is worth 300 dollars." said Shockwave.

Soundwave became shocked.

"Wait, you can't be serious." said Soundwave.

Blitzwing looked on the phone as well.

"Scratch that, that's in mint condition." said Blitzwing.

Shockwave looked at his friend.

"That's terrible." said Shockwave.

Ramjet looked on the phone.

"But ironically he is worth a hundred dollars on Ebay if he has all the accessories." said Ramjet.

All the Decepticons with mouths smiled.

"How convenient." the Decepticons said.

"We do have a smart phone, not like we need a tape recorder." said Rumble.

Soundwave stepped backwards.

"Wait, lets talk about this." said Soundwave.

"Get him." said Thundercracker.

All the Deceptions tacked their former friend who is worth 100.00.

Later; Soundwave was in cassette player form and was healed by Thundercracker.

"We'd like to trade this transformer for that gun." said Thundercracker.

"You give me a transforming camera, you got yourself a deal." said the pawn shop owner.

"This phone has a 8 megapixel HD camera with flash." said Rumble.

Reflector stepped back in shock.

"No, no, lets not be to hasty." said Reflector.

"Get him." said Thundercracker.

The Decepticon's tackled Reflector.

Later; Thundercracker was holding Reflector who was in camera mode.

"That's more like it. You got yourself a deal." said the pawn shop owner.

"Now give us that gun." said Thundercracker.

Later; the group walked out of the pawn shop with Megatron.

Thundercracker removed the trigger lock just before Megatron turned into his robot mode.

Rumble chuckled nervously.

"No hard feelings for pawning you off in a pawn shop, right fearless leader?" said Rumble.

Megatron however shot Rumble with his fusion cannon.

 **End Cutaway Gag**

"Yep, outdated." said Duncan.

In the announcer booth; Soar the Eagle was looking at the race track and speaking into a microphone.

"Welcome one and all, to the Toon City 3000. With me is star from the Hunchback of Notre Dame films, Hugo Gargoyle." said Soar.

He turned to a stone gargoyle named Hugo.

"OH YEAH, THE EXCITEMENT HERE IS SPICY! I want to see lots of explosions and monster trucks." said Hugo.

Soar laughed.

"Just about everyone wants to see that. Now many people describe this as a racing version of the Hunger Games. You got anything to say about that?" said Soar.

Hugo looked at Soar.

"I SAY A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE NUTS, BUT HEY THIS IS LIFE!" shouted Hugo.

Soar looked down down at the track.

"The racers are preparing for the race." said Soar.

Long Arm was working on Sideswipe who was still in car mode.

"Alright, I've instaled a cannon hidden in your hood so that you can fire anything you want." said Long Arm.

"Okay, anything else I need to know about?" said Sideswipe.

"I also installed an emergency gas tank next to the steering wheel for if you're falling behind." said Long Arm, "If you do, put this type of gas inside."

He gave Duncan a can of gas that was labeled 'Can of liquidized Spinach Energon'.

The Juvie became shocked.

"Energon mixed with spinach, seriously?" said Duncan.

"Hey it worked for Underbite." said Long Arm.

"I'm pretty sure those were empty cans of spinach." said Duncan.

"Still." said Long Arm.

Duncan shook his head and put on a red skull helmet before getting into Sideswipe.

"You ready?" said Duncan.

"As always." said Sideswipe, "Though I'm not happy you got me into this mess."

Long Arm looked at Duncan.

"Remember, only use the energon in an emergency. It's got so much power that I don't even know what'll happen if used." said Long Arm.

Duncan nodded.

"Understood." said Duncan.

He opened up Sideswipe's glove box and put the can of energon in before closing it.

At Saturn; Sideswipe and Windblade's two mini con kids were on the rings of Saturn watching the Toon City 3000 on iPad.

"This is very awesome." said the red minicon.

"I know, an iPad that can get signals from Earth at a different planet." the black minicon said without noticing that his own brother grabbed a dial on his back that was set to Taran Killam's voice before setting it to Seth Green's voice and removing it, "I could use this iPad all day."

The minicon became shocked and turned to his chuckling brother.

"Seriously Redstreak?" said the black minicon.

The minicon known as Redstreak laughed.

"That always works Blackwave." said Redstreak.

The minicon known as Blackwave groaned.

" _And we're getting look at some type of Cybertronian with a human driver._ " Soar said from the iPad.

The two minicons became shocked and looked at the iPad.

"Hey it's Dad." said Redstreak.

"I think so." said Blackwave.

Redstreak turned to his brother.

"Seriously? I just said that Dad is in a race." said Redstreak.

Windblade removed the iPad from Redstreak's hands.

"And what kind of race is your father in?" said Windblade.

She looked at the screen.

"The Toon City 3000, people describe it as the racing version of the Hunger Games." said Blackwave.

Windblade became shocked and put the iPad away.

"Kids, it's time to go home." said Windblade.

The minicon's groaned.

"But Mom, we just got here." said Redstreak.

"You spent the entire trip on the iPad." said Windblade, "Now get moving."

The minicon's turned into the tiny fighter jets and attached to Windblade before she went jet mode and flew off, destroying the rings of Saturn in the process.

Bubbles the Talking Dolphin who was in his home came out of the bathroom.

"Whoo, that was a big one." said Bubbles.

He turned and saw that the rings of Saturn were destroyed and became shocked.

"Oh for the love of...GIVE ME A BREAK! Can't I go to the bathroom without anything happening to Saturn?" said Bubbles.


	5. Case Closed

Back at the Mystery Shack; everybody was in the living room as Sonic walked in, still in his detective outfit.

"Now, you are all wondering why I summoned you here." said Sonic.

"Yeah, to solve the mystery of who killed Kevin." said Ray.

"Also because the Toon City 3000 race is about to start." said Sonic.

Howard did some thinking.

"The Toon City 3000, isn't that the racing version of the Hunger Games?" said Howard.

Soar the Eagle appeared with a Megaphone.

"YES! YES IT IS!" The Eagle shouted in Howard's ear and went off.

"Why was there an eagle in here?" said Ford.

"Back on topic, one of you is a killer. And I've got it narrowed down to five people." said Sonic.

He went to a whiteboard and flipped it over, revealing pictures of Wendy, Ben, Howard, Stan Pines, and Chuck the Yellow Bird.

Wendy, Ben, and Howard became shocked.

Stan just stared on.

"Eh, saw that coming." said Stan.

"WAIT WHY ME!" Ben asked madder then Raph in a rain storm.

"Why am I a suspect?" said Howard.

Wendy looked at the Chuck photo and became confused.

"Wait, why is there an Angry Bird as a suspect?" said Wendy.

She turned to see Chuck the Yellow Bird drinking a smoothie.

"I owe him eighty dollars for two Pokemon video game that weren't even released yet." said Chuck.

"Wait why is Soos in a wedding Dress?" asked Ford.

And sure enough Soos was in a wedding dress.

"Lost a bet dude." said Soos.

"Anyways, each of these people had a motive. Wendy was jealous of Ray having a girlfriend and not allowing her to touch the table, Ben because Ray revealed the whole story of the omnitrix, Howard because of the recordings, and Stan because he hates rap music." said Sonic.

He pulled out a pointing stick and put it on the picture of Ben.

"My first thought was that Ben committed the crime." said Sonic.

 **Theory Gag**

Ben walked out of the RV and looked at the disk jockey table with anger.

"Okay Kevin, for having an auto tune microphone, I'm going to go Rath on you." said Ben.

" _But then I realized that there was no way Ben could have done it since he could have gotten a different alien._ " Sonic narrated.

Ben activated his Omnitrix and slammed down on it, but became Walkatrout.

Walkatrout looked at himself.

"Dang it." said Walkatrout.

 **End Theory Gag**

Ben became mad and stood up.

"Hey, I could have destroyed the table." said Ben.

He activated his omnitrix.

"Let's go Jury Rigg." said Ben.

He slammed down on the omnitrix and became Whampire.

Whampire looked at himself and sighed.

"At least there isn't any sunlight in the room." said Whampire.

Sonic however turned on a sun lamp that was aiming at Whampire and the vampire alien started burning up before running off while screaming.

"Well he's out." said Ray.

"Yep." said Stan.

Sonic then moved the stick to Howard.

"My next thought was Howard because of the recordings." said Sonic.

 **Theory Gag**

Howard looked at the disk jockey table with anger.

"I'll be the one making the recordings this time." said Howard.

" _But then I found out that Howard spent 2 hours in a bathroom taking a massively huge dump._ " Sonic narrated.

Howard's belly roared and he grabbed it in shock before running off.

 **End Theory Gag**

Howard became mad.

"You can't prove that." said Howard.

Sonic pull out his iPad and connected to his Facebook page and revealed a video of Howard taking a painful dump.

"GOOD GOD THAT'S PAINFUL!" Howard said from the video.

Everyone looked at the video.

"Poor toilet having to take all of that." said Penny.

The Toilet who walked by with two suitcases looked at everyone.

"Your telling me. I quit." said the Toilet and walked off.

Everyone was shocked

"Was that toilet just talking?" said Trent.

"I must have been eating to much leaves." said Soos.

"Any who, we'll go on with the evidence." said Sonic, "The first bit of evidence I found was small drips of Coca Cola on the table that could incriminate Wendy."

Everyone turned to Wendy who was about to open a can of Coca Cola before becoming shocked.

She tossed the can out the window before it hit Whampire who was still running around while burning up.

"OW WHO THREW THIS CAN!?" Whampire shouted.

"But she didn't destroy the table since soda couldn't cause an explosion, only something to short out." said Sonic.

 **Flashback**

Wendy walked out of the Mystery Shack and looked at the disk jockey table.

" _True she was jealous of not being able to touch some of Ray's property, but before going to her own home, she accidentally spilled some soda on the table._ " Sonic narrated.

She drank a can of Coca Cola but spilled some of it on the table by mistake.

She became shocked and pulled out a rag and started cleaning the table up.

" _Thinking quickly, she tried to clean up the table to hide any evidence of her being near it, but didn't do to good a job._ " Sonic narrated.

Wendy then walked off.

 **End Flashback**

"Okay, now you're just making me look bad." said Wendy.

"But that story brings me to my most interesting piece of evidence, the dust on the table wasn't dust, but pipe smoke." said Sonic.

Everyone turned to Stan in shock who was currently smoking a metal pipe.

He looked at everyone in shocked then turned to Sonic in anger.

"This means nothing, you're smoking a pipe yourself." said Stan.

"True, but mine only blows bubbles." Sonic said in a cheeky voice.

He then blew into his pipe, making bubbles come out.

"He's got you there." said Mabel.

"Yep." said Soos.

Stan groaned.

"I don't have to put up with this. If you'll excuse me, I've got to commit lots of tax felony." said Stan.

He tried to walk off, but a clinging sound was heard.

He saw that he was handcuffed to a stop sign and became shocked.

"Did you just cuff me to a stop sign?" said Stan.

"No I didn't just cuff you to a stop sign, I cuffed you to a stop sign five minutes ago." said Sonic, "I'm amazed you just noticed it."

"Even I did not see that." said Ray.

Sonic pulled out the remains of the stick of TNT.

Stan scoffed.

"That could be anyone's." said Stan.

Sonic then pulled out the black piece of cloth.

"And this isn't?" said Sonic.

Stan looked at his left sleeve and noticed that it was torn up and missing a piece.

He became shocked.

 **Flashback**

Stan walked out of the Mystery Shack while smoking his pipe and looked at the table.

" _You didn't like that your generation of music was being ruined by loud blaring songs, so you decided to take matters into your own hands._ " Sonic narrated.

Stan put the pipe on the table and pulled out a stick of TNT before putting it in the table.

" _While you were getting ready to light the fuse, you accidentally let some pipe smoke fall on the table._ " Sonic narrated.

Stan pulled out a lighter and lit it before lighting the fuse.

He ran off, but got some of his sleeve stuck.

" _Little did you know, that you were in so much of a hurry that you left enough evidence to incriminate you._ " Sonic narrated.

 **End Flashback**

"The game is over old man." said Sonic.

Stan scoffed.

"Yeah right, it could have been Ford trying to frame me." said Stan.

Ford turned to his brother in anger.

"Don't make me your escape goat." said Ford.

Sonic pulled out his S.H.E.I.L.D Judgment Scanner and aimed it at Stan.

"That's, where you're wrong pal. Judgment Mode." said Sonic.

He pushed on the button and the device opened up before scanning Stan.

"Based on the evidence, you are charged with destruction of property." said Sonic.

The device stopped on the red X.

"Guilty." said Sonic.

Stan sighed.

"Okay fine, I did it." said Stan, "But only because my generation of music is becoming a mockery."

"You poor old fart, one thing you should know is that you can't destroy music, it'll always improve in some way. Case closed, now who wants to see the Toon City 3000?" said Sonic.

Randy, Howard, and Ray who were wearing soda drinking helmets and huge foam hands were cheering.

Whampire returned now very burned up and grey.

"I'd cheer myself, but I'm very exhausted." said Whampire.

Randy hit the omnitrix, turning Whampire back to Ben.

"Thanks, I needed that." said Ben.

Randy smiled.

"Sure thing." said Randy.

Sonic removed his detective outfit, but kept the pipe and put on a blue soda drinking helmet with two cans of Mug Root Beer in the sides.

He sat down on the couch and flipped on the TV.

Everyone turned to Sonic.

"You're keeping the pipe?" said Trent.

"It's starting to grow on me." said Sonic.

"Well at least it's not a black licorice one." said Dipper

"Amen to that." said Sonic.


	6. Let the Hunger Games Race Begin

Back at the Toon City 3000; lots of racers were heading to the finish line.

"The race is about to begin, the excitement is wild as the racers take to the finish line." said Soar.

"You're telling me." said Hugo, "Now to just call my bookie."

He pulled out a cell phone, and dialed a number before putting it to his ear.

"Yeah, this is your number one customer Hugo Gargoyle. I'd like to bet ten million dollars on the red Autobot known as Sideswipe to win." said Hugo.

He turned off his cell phone and turned to Soar.

"What, everybody does that type of stuff." said Hugo.

Soar nodded.

"Fair enough." said Soar.

On the track; the racers were starting their cars.

Lord Hater who was in a repaired Hate RV was smirking.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Hater laughed.

On one car Demon Racer#2 (Power Rangers Turbo Monster) was in his car ready to race.

"Let's do this." said Demon Racer#2.

Wile E appeared over the starting line and lit a fuse on a stick of TNT before running off.

"And the fuse has been lit." said Soar.

Wile E hid behind some pipes and covered his ears.

But the stick of TNT rolled behind the coyote and tapped his legs.

He turned and saw the bomb and looked at the readers in shock.

The bomb exploded.

The vehicles drove off.

"And they're off." said Soar.

"AND WHAT A RACE THIS HAS STARTED!" shouted Hugo.

Duncan pulled out a blaster similar to Han Solo's blaster.

"Wait, you brought a gun to this race?" said Sideswipe.

"What, the only rule in this race is that the driver can't abandon his or her car if there even is a driver." said Duncan.

"Fair enough." said Sideswipe.

Duncan looked out the window and started shooting at a Grinder Motorcycle.

The bike was hit and went crazy before going off the track and exploding.

Long Arm chuckled.

"Now this is how races should be. Nothing can ruin this moment." said Long Arm.

A blaster sound was heard and Long Arm grabbed a shield very similar to Captain America's before blocking a laser.

"Nice to see you to Windblade." said Long Arm.

Windblade who appeared and turned into her robot mode became confused.

"How'd you know it was me?" said Windblade.

"Who else can shoot out a ton of rounds and miss every time?" said Long Arm, "Besides, that ain't normal sweetheart."

Windblade is mad.

Duncan looked at the pit area and saw Windblade.

"Hey, your hubbies here." said Duncan.

"Wait, what?" said Sideswipe, "I knew I shouldn't have gotten involved in this."

"Relax dude, I've got an idea." said Duncan.

He pulled out some type of Mexican disguise and started to put it on.

12 laps later; Sideswipe went to the pit as Long Arm started doing work on Sideswipe.

Windblade looked in Sideswipe and saw Duncan still with his helmet on.

He turned to Windblade and removed his helmet, revealing that he was perfectly disguised as a Mexican.

"Habla Espaniol?" Duncan said in a Spanish accent.

Windblade shook her head.

"You're not fooling me Duncan." said Windblade.

Duncan acted confused.

"Who be this Duncan that you speak of?" said Duncan.

"You be the Duncan that I speak of, I can tell because you've got a green Mohawk and a bunch of piercings." said Windblade.

"Many Mexican's tend to look like American or Mexican men, but that doesn't mean that I be-"Duncan said before Windblade removed one of his ear piercing's, causing him to revert to his original accent, "Ow, son of a bitch that hurts."

"Yep, saw that coming." said Sideswipe.

Duncan turned to the steering wheel.

"And you didn't warn me?" said Duncan.

"I just wanted to see what would happen." said Sideswipe.

"Oh please one of the racers got eaten." said Duncan.

 **Flashback**

Two minutes ago; Demom Racer#2 was laughing crazy as he was racing.

"YOU WONT STOP ME!" shouted Demon Racer#2.

However; the Indominus Rex suddenly appeared and ate the racer.

The genetically modified dinosaur roared before camoflauging himself.

 **End Flashback**

Sideswipe gulped.

"Help me." said Sideswipe.

Windblade smirked.

"No." She said.

She then pushed Sideswipe onto the track.

"Women, can't live with them, can't live without them." said Duncan.

"I know I can't live without Windblade. I've got a little something for here in my trunk. Some type of engagement ring, but Cybertronian size." said Sideswipe.

Duncan became shocked.

"How the hell did you get an engagement ring the size of an Autobot finger?" said Duncan.

Soar and Hugo were now eating tons of popcorn.

"The race is getting interesting as Goldar takes the lead, but we'll see if he'll survive the monster trucks." said Soar.

A bunch of monster trucks were released on the tracks.

"And if those trucks can't stop Goldar, then the Indominus Rex will." said Soar.

"And if the dinosaur can't then-"Hugo said before noticing a bunch of swinging pendulums on the track, "Wait, why are there a bunch of swinging pendulums on the track, nobody ordered any of that shit, it's overkill. Get rid of them."

Wile E pulled a rope that removed all the pendulums.

Duncan was shooting at the Mach Five before turning to the steering wheel.

"So wait, you plan on proposing to Windblade?" said Duncan, "I find that pretty weird."

"You earthlings do that, so why can't a Cybertronian do it?" said Sideswipe.

Duncan nodded.

"Fair enough." said Duncan.

Hater started approaching Sideswipe from behind.

"Eat pizza." said Hater.

He fired a pizza from his Hate RV, but Duncan managed to grab it with a pizza box and shot at one of Hater's wheels before he swerved out of control.

"CRAP!" yelled Hater.

He then crashed into a wall before the vehicle exploded.

Duncan opened up the box and saw a pepperoni and mushroom pizza.

"Yum." said Duncan, "Hey Sideswipe, just out of curiosity, how did you manage to fit a huge engagement ring in your trunk?"

"I let Optimus know of my plans to propose." said Sideswipe.

"Alright." said Duncan.

At the back of the race; Mario and his brother Luigi were sharing a kart.

"We're losing Mario." said Luigi.

Mario turned to his brother.

"Time for the blue turtle shell." said Mario.

The Green Mario Brother is shocked.

"Okay then." said Luigi.

He pulled out a blue turtle shell with wings and tossed it.

The shell made its way to Goldar before landing on his car, creating an explosion that caused the car to fly in the air before landing on the ground and exploding itself.

"Dammit." said Goldar.

Soon the Indominus Rex ate Goldar before camoflauging itself.

Duncan put on some high tech goggles.

"What're you doing?" said Sideswipe.

"Finding that Indominus Rex that keeps eating everyone." said Duncan.

He turned on the heat signature part of the goggles and saw the dinosaur.

"And there he is. And it looks like he is eating a peach." said Duncan.

Sure enough; the dinosaur was eating a peach.

"How are we supposed to stop something we can't see?" said Sideswipe.

Duncan did some thinking before coming up with an idea.

"I've got it, follow my lead." said Duncan.

Sideswipe made a cannon emerge from his hood and shot out a huge paintball that managed to hit the camouflaged dinosaur, making it red.

The Autobot in car mode went to the dino and went robot mode with his Decepticon Hunter out in blaster mode and ran on the dinosaur before shooting it's back.

Soar and Hugo were shocked.

"Sideswipe turned into his robot mode and is shooting the Indominus Rex." said Soar.

"Now that'll lead to some excitement." said Hugo.

The Autobot jumped off the Dino and everything went slow motion like as the blaster turned into a grenade launcher and Sideswipe aimed the grenade launcher into the dinosaur's mouth and shot a grenade into it.

A powering up sound was heard from inside the Indominus Rex's stomach and the dinosaur became shocked and looked at the readers in shock.

"Uh oh." the dino growled.

The genetically enhanced T-Rex exploded as everything went back to normal pace and Sideswipe went back to car mode and drove off.

Lots of other racers came flying out onto the track.

"Please tell me we came out of the mouth." said Goldar.

"I don't want to know." said Demon Racer#2.

The audience started cheering.

"I DON'T BELIEVE IT, THE INDOMINUS REX HAS BEEN KILLED!" yelled Soar.

"I have never in my life seen anything very exciting as this." said Hugo.

Long Arm chuckled.

"I knew he had it in him." said Long Arm.

Windblade turned to Long Arm.

"You had a bunch of money on him to lose." said Windblade.

Long Arm looked at Windblade.

"Now what makes you say that?" said Long Arm.

Windblade pointed to a booth that was labeled 'Bet to see if Sideswipe will die on the track.' and Cannonball operating it.

"That." said Windblade.

"Okay, that could be someones booth." said Long Arm.

"This booth was made by my best friend Long Arm." said Cannonball.

"Long Arm is a very common name to Cybertronian's who take on tow truck forms." said Long Arm.

"And there he is." said Cannonball.

He aimed his turret at Long Arm and flashed a spotlight on him.

Long Arm groaned.

"Okay fine, I came up with that idea. But I already kept Sideswipe from going into the All Spark, and created two minicon children. What more do you want from me?" said Long Arm.

"An inventor and medical expert Autobot without a huge ego." said Windblade.

"Can I get back to you on that?" said Long Arm.

Sideswipe continued to go down the track, but his two back tires blew up before steam came out from his hood and he abruptly stopped.

Duncan walked out of Sideswipe and opened the hood.

The steam cleared up a bit and Duncan looked inside.

"Exhaust pipe is broken very badly." said Duncan.

"How can it be broken? I'm a robot from another planet." said Sideswipe.

Duncan looked at the back two tires.

"And you won't be going anywhere." said Duncan.

"We won't be going anywhere." said Sideswipe.

Duncan went back into Sideswipe and sat down.

"If only there was something we could use to get you back in the race." said Duncan.

He then remembered something.

"Wait." said Duncan.

He noticed an emergency fuel pump and opened up the glove box before removing the can of Spinach mixed Energon.

"Sideswipe buddy, we're going to win." said Duncan.

He opened up the emergency gas pump and poured it into the pump as crazy music started playing.

Duncan closed up the pump as the exhaust pipe was instantly repaired, the tires were restored, and 15 jet boosters emerged from Sideswipe's back.

The teen looked at the boosters and became shocked.

"When did you get jet boosters?" said Duncan.

"I don't know." said Sideswipe.

Windblade looked on in shocked.

"There we jet boosters in Slick?" Windblade said before turning to Long Arm, "You sure know how to upgrade any Autobot."

Long Arm however was confused.

"Wait, Sideswipe has jet boosters now?" said Long Arm.

Windblade fell anime style.

"What?" asked Long Arm.

Duncan started revving up Sideswipe.

"Alright, let's see what these things can do." said Duncan.

He stomped down on the peddle and Sideswipe went down the tracks at blinding speed, knocking all the racers out of the race before their cars blew up.

All the monster trucks went after the Autobot, but Sideswipe was going so fast, that they were destroyed as well.

Duncan chuckled.

"This is a default win buddy, time to slow down a bit." said Duncan.

"I can't." said Sideswipe.

Duncan became confused.

"Why?" said Duncan.

"I'm to scared to do it." said Sideswipe.

Duncan groaned and stepped on the brakes very hard, causing Sideswipe to tip over on his side and tumble past the finish line.

"Big mistake." said Duncan.

The Juvie then went flying out of Sideswipe before the car went robot mode and tried to grab Duncan while flying in slow motion.

Long Arm became confused.

"Why must the really really cool stunts always play out in slow motion?" said Long Arm.

"I've always wondered that myself." said Windblade.

Sideswipe managed to grab Duncan before everything went back to a normal and the Autobot slid on the ground a bit before stopping.

Duncan crawled to Sideswipe's head.

"Sideswipe, buddy, get up." said Duncan.

The Autobot groaned and started to push himself up.

He put his right foot on the ground, but groaned in pain.

"Easy Sideswipe, small steps." said Sideswipe.

He managed to get up on his feet and looked around to see everyone cheering him on.

Long Arm laughed.

"Yes." said Long Arm.

The red sports car Autobot smiled and started limping over to a stage with a huge trophy.

Duncan smiled.

"I always knew you had it in you." said Duncan.

Sideswipe lifted up the trophy as everyone cheered.

"I never thought I would win this race. But I would like to thank the people who supported me during this race, Long Arm, and Windblade." said Sideswipe.

Duncan laughed.

"That's funny, last I checked Long Arm only helped out once and Windblade pushed you back onto the track very rudely." Duncan said before noticing Sideswipe looking behind himself and becoming shocked, "And she's getting ready to shoot me from behind isn't she?"

Sideswipe nodded.

Duncan was then shot in the back before flying off.

Windblade appeared next to Sideswipe and put an arm around him.

Sideswipe pulled out a Cybertronian sized engagement ring and showed it to Windblade.

The fighter jet Autobot became shocked and looked at the ring then back at Sideswipe.

The car Autobot closed his eyes and opened them up, revealing that he was doing the Puss in Boots eyes.

Duncan looked at Sideswipe doing he cat eyes.

"I can't help but think that this is weird." said Duncan.


	7. Gravity Fall Concert

Back at Gravity Falls; there was a huge cheering audience at the stage next to the Mystery Shack.

The Sonic Underground was getting ready for their concert.

Ray was playing his accordion.

Ray sighed and Sonic saw this.

"Me and Kevin were so close." said Ray.

Sonic approached Ray.

"How about you sing a song this time." said Sonic.

"Nothing can make me feel better." said Ray.

"I'll let you sing a Weird Al Yankovic song." said Sonic.

"Sorry but not even that" said Ray.

"How about that?" said Sonic.

He pointed to Stan Pines who was in a pink tutu and ballet dancing to the Nutcracker.

"This is embarrassing." said Stan.

Ray smiled and started laughing.

"Okay I feel better now." said Ray.

He turned to Sonic.

"Is the allowing me to sing offer still on the table?" said Ray.

Later; the band was on stage and Sonic grabbed a microphone.

"Hello Gravity Falls, normally I'd be the one to sing, but I'm going to let someone else do it." said Sonic.

He placed the microphone on a stand and walked off as Ray appeared.

"Hey, I'm Rayman. Normally one would ask if your ready to rock, but in this case I'll make like Weird Al Yankovic." said Ray.

McFist who was in the audience groaned.

"Weird Al sucks." said McFist.

Ray groaned and pulled out a blaster before shooting McFist in the chest, knocking him out.

Viceroy who was with McFist became shocked and pulled out a white flag and started waving it.

"Don't shoot me please." said Viceroy.

Ray put the blaster away.

"Are you ready to Polka?" said Ray.

Everyone cheered.

"BOOOOOO!" Master Vile shouted.

Ray made a hand go to Master Vile and punched him in the face really hard.

"Is this the real life, is this just fantasy, caught in a land slide, no escape from reality." Ray sang.

The limbless teen then played his accordion.

Everyone else joined in on the song.

Stan groaned.

"He ruined the best Queen song ever." said Stan.

"I agree." said Ford.

"Even I agree." said Bill's Ghost.

The two turned to Bill Cypher.

"Ghostbusters?" said Ford.

"Ghostbusters." said Stan.

"The original?" said Ford.

"The original." said Stan.

At Long Arms lab; he was working on Sideswipe's leg.

"Okay, just a few more adjustments, and you'll be as good as new." said Long Arm.

He finished up.

"Now I just need to test your reflexes." said Long Arm.

He pulled out a hammer and lightly tapped Sideswipe's knee.

The red Autobot smacked Long Arm across the face.

"OW!" Long Arm shouted.

"Sorry, it's my reflexes." said Sideswipe.

"Yeah right." said Long Arm.

Sideswipe went car mode and drove out of the lab, but an apple was placed on top of him by Prowl.

"Stay still will you?" said Prowl.

He walked off as Sideswipe gulped.

"What're you doing?" said Sideswipe.

Prowl turned around and aimed a blaster at the apple.

"Don't worry, I won't hit you." said Prowl.

"That's what worries me." said Sideswipe.

Prowl then shot the apple off of Sideswipe.

"By the way, congrats on winning the race and your engagement." said Prowl.

"Thanks." said the red autobot.

The car drove off.

Prowl then aimed his blaster in the air and fired a couple of rounds.

However; a bunch of dead eagles fell to the ground.

The cop car Autobot gulped in shock.

"There goes my status as a cop." said Prowl.


End file.
